14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (2023)

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    14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (1)Lauren CahnUpdated: Nov. 27, 2022

      Got a dispute? A divorce? A potentially lucrative deal? Read these insider tips before you think about calling a lawyer.


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (2)Andrey_Popov/Shutterstock

      When should you hire a lawyer?

      When disputes arise, a person’s first inclination is often to call a lawyer, attorney Randolph Rice tells Reader’s Digest. But there are many situations in which hiring a lawyer is the last thing you should do. Says Rice, ideally, everyone would resolve disputes without lawyering up. “Getting lawyers involved can escalate tensions and delay resolution, all at great time and expense.” Take it from an attorney—before hiring one, consider if there are other ways to resolve your dispute. Maybe start by checking out these hilarious lawyer jokes.


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (3)FabrikaSimf/Shutterstock

      Before hiring a lawyer

      “When you have a dispute with someone, the first thing a lawyer does is send a demand letter hoping to resolve the dispute,” explains attorney, Russell D. Knight. On reading a demand letter, the other person will often say, “this isn’t worth the trouble” and they quickly settle. But here’s a secret from Knight: You don’t need a lawyer to write a demand letter. You can do it yourself. Just make it look as formal as possible, and you may find your dispute goes away—no charge to you.

      (Video) 14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You in United States | Reader's Digest


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (4)Billion Photos/Shutterstock

      How to tell a good lawyer from a bad lawyer

      It’s not as hard as you might think, according to attorneyRandall M. Kessler, author of Divorce: Protect Yourself, Your Kids and Your Future. “Shop around and trust your instincts,” he advises. “Does the lawyer listen to you? Do they explain things in a way you can understand? And are they willing to discuss fees and costs? The person you hire will need to be someone you trust and believe in, so be sure you feel very good about them from the start.”


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (5)kan_chana/Shutterstock

      What others think about your lawyer matters

      Check your potential lawyer’s reputation. “Many cases are won, and lost, on the reputations of the lawyers involved,” attorney Rice tells Reader’s Digest. “In the courtroom, if your lawyer has an outstanding reputation, the judge may give your case some deference, for example.” Outside the courtroom, your lawyer’s reputation could color the way the attorneys on the other side respond to requests for information and offers to negotiate.


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (6)Nirat.pix/Shutterstock

      “See you in court” is a bit misleading

      In choosing your attorney and your plan of action in resolving a dispute, it’s important to consider that despite what you see on television, most cases never see the inside of a courtroom. Typically, they’re settled outside the courtroom because of the time and expense involved, according to attorneyDarren Heitner, author of How to Play the Game: What Every Sports Attorney Needs to Know.

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      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (7)Warehouse of Images/Shutterstock

      In fact, a lawyer should try to stay out of court

      “In my experience, a good lawyer always finds every opportunity to keep a case from being decided by a judge, and only relents on trying a case before the bench when all alternatives have been exhausted,” attorney, Jason Cruz says. “If a lawyer suggests they want to try the case in front of a judge, you should definitely speak with another lawyer before proceeding,”



      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (8)igorstevanovic/Shutterstock

      Be honest, expect honesty

      It’s imperative that both the lawyer and the client approach one another with complete honesty, attorneyPaul Edelstein, tells Reader’s Digest. “Winning cases can be lost because of a client who lies or exaggerates just as easily as because of a lawyer who tells the client what the client wants to hear instead of what is true.” So when dealing with attorneys, don’t just look for honesty—be honest.


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (9)Stokkete/Shutterstock

      Be prepared for your meetings

      “If you want to improve your chances of securing the best lawyer to take your case, you need to prepare before you meet them,” advises attorney Stephen Babcock. “Get your story, facts, and proof together well before your first meeting.” This not only ensures that you understand your own needs, but it helps a good lawyer to ascertain whether he or she can actually help you. “We want the best clients too. Proving you’re organized and reliable helps us.”


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (10)TaLaNoVa/Shutterstock

      Make sure you’re not seeking a brain surgeon for a foot injury

      “Many people assume that any lawyer can handle any problem,” attorney Jory Lange points out to Reader’s Digest. But like doctors, lawyers have specialties, and that’s where their talents and experience lie. “When you choose a lawyer, make sure they have experience with your type of case,” Lange advises.

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      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (11)Pressmaster/Shutterstock

      Don’t hire an “attack dog” as your divorce attorney

      When choosing whom to hire, not only should your lawyer’s practice specialty come into play, but so should your lawyer’s personal style, points out Lara Bazelon, Associate Professor of Law and director of the Criminal Juvenile Justice and Racial Justice Clinical Programs at the University of San Francisco School of Law. For example, most divorces can be handled using online forms and mediation, she explains. If you involve “lawyers prone to adversarial stances,” things will get much uglier—and much more expensive.

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      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (12)maradon 333/Shutterstock

      The fuzzy side to billable hours

      Many lawyers charge “per hour,” but when it comes to billable hours, an hour isn’t always an hour, Robinson points out. What if you talk to your lawyer on the phone for 30 seconds? Will your lawyer bill you for a full hour? A 15-minute segment? Or something closer to 30 seconds? These are the questions you should be asking, says Robinson, because it can make a huge difference in your bill.


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (13)isak55/Shutterstock

      Expenses add up

      When hiring an attorney, a potential money pit is “expenses” outside of the lawyer’s billable hours. Expenses include everything—copying and faxing costs, hiring expert witnesses, and even traveling via private jet, points out attorney Justin C. Roberts. Some lawyers don’t just pass the charges along; instead, they charge an additional percentage fee. Whatever their method, you need to know it up front so there won’t be any surprises when the bill arrives.


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      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (14)Freedomz/Shutterstock

      Think twice about “good deals”

      “Be wary of lawyers who quote low fees—noticeably lower than the standard—in order to get your business,” advises attorney Nathaniel Pitoniak. “Consumers should use their instincts about the work ethic, honesty, and relevant experience of a lawyer instead of making their decision on percentage points. If a lawyer’s fee sounds too good to be true, it’s likely because they struggle to retain business or don’t anticipate putting much effort towards your case—both are bad for someone who needs a strong lawyer.”


      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (15)Andrey_Popov/Shutterstock

      Insurance denials are appealable

      If you feel helpless when faced with an insurance denial, please know that you might be able to appeal with the help of a qualified lawyer, says David Himelfarb, attorney. Insurance companies routinely deny long-term disability claims, for example, particularly because it’s assumed that most people don’t have access to reputable attorneys to challenge the denial. “This is where intricate knowledge of the legal and insurance process, as well as the right team of experts to prove the claim, can reverse the odds.”

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      Originally Published: November 20, 2018

      14 Secrets Lawyers Will Never Tell You (16)

      Lauren Cahn

      Lauren Cahn is a New York–based writer whose work has appeared regularly on Reader's Digest and in a variety of other publications since 2008. She covers life and style, popular culture, law, religion, health, fitness, yoga, entertaining and entertainment. Lauren is also an author of crime fiction, and her first full-length manuscript, "The Trust Game," was short-listed for the 2017 CLUE Award for emerging talent in the genre of suspense fiction.

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      Are lawyers allowed to tell your secrets? ›

      lawyer-client relationship of trust and prevents a lawyer from revealing the client's information even when not subjected to such compulsion. Thus, a lawyer may not reveal such information except with the informed consent* of the client or as authorized or required by the State Bar Act, these rules, or other law.

      What you should not tell your lawyer? ›

      Top 5 things you should never tell your lawyer
      • My case will be easy money for you. ...
      • I have already done the work for you. ...
      • I forgot I had an appointment. ...
      • I've already talked to a lot of other lawyers. ...
      • I don't have all my documents.
      Apr 19, 2022

      Can you really tell your lawyer everything? ›

      A client should always feel comfortable telling their attorney the whole truth of the matter for which they are being represented. Any communications that take place with the purpose of securing assistance in a legal proceeding, legal services, or securing a legal opinion are protected.

      Do lawyers have to keep everything a secret? ›

      The attorney-client privilege protects only communications, not facts. Clients cannot hide facts by telling them to their lawyers. What is privileged is the content of the communications between the clients and their lawyers. What clients say or write to their lawyers is privileged.

      Can you sue someone for telling your secret? ›

      Your reputation, career, and home life could be in peril when someone spreads false and damaging information about you or your business. However, nobody has the right to ruin your reputation carelessly or maliciously. If you have been the victim of slander and incurred damages as a result, you could sue for defamation.

      Can a lawyer purposely lose a case? ›

      Lawyers are also required not to mislead the court, which means the lawyer would then have to contact the judge and/or opposing lawyer and give the case up immediately. It wouldn't be ethical to argue the case as if hoping to win while intending to lose.

      What is the most common complaint against lawyers? ›

      The most common disciplinary complaints filed against lawyers are for:
      • Neglect.
      • Lack of communication.
      • Misrepresentation/Dishonesty.
      • Scope of representation.
      • Fee disputes/Excessive fees.
      Mar 7, 2022

      What do lawyers say in court when they don't agree? ›

      Objection. Objection to the form, your Honor. Objection, your Honor, leading.

      Should I tell my lawyer the whole truth? ›

      It is the kind of information that the client may wish to share with anyone – even their lawyer. The truth is this – a lawyer, any lawyer handling any important legal matter must have all of the facts and evidence in the case to do their job.

      Are you supposed to be completely honest with your lawyer? ›

      Being honest with your attorney is crucial to your case. Because of attorney-client privilege, anything you say to your attorney will stay between the two of you. Some things might be hard to admit to yourself, let alone someone else, but being dishonest with your lawyer will not only hurt you but also them.

      Should I always listen to my lawyer? ›

      At the same time, it is vital that the attorney be accessible and empathetic to the concerns of the client. Ultimately, the client does have to follow the professional advice of their attorney on case strategy. If the attorney and client cannot stay on the same page, the results can become disastrous.

      Why do lawyers object to everything? ›

      The primary reason an attorney makes an objection is to preserve his right to appeal if he loses the case.

      Do lawyers lie to help their clients? ›

      A new Rule of Professional Conduct applicable to California lawyers says that while representing a client, a lawyer shall not knowingly make a false statement of material fact or law to a third person. Rule 4.1 is aimed at lawyers communicating with opposing counsel or an opposing party.

      Can you pretend to have a lawyer? ›

      This is misrepresentation, and every state has a way to punish this type of fraud. Even if a state does not have a specific statute to address the false practice of law, there are general deceptive trade practice statutes that can serve as a basis for criminal cases.

      Can I sue someone for gossiping about me? ›

      If someone makes false statements against you and damages your career, personal life, and public reputation, you have the legal right to file a slander lawsuit.

      Can you sue someone for spreading lies about you? ›

      A slander lawsuit is a lawsuit you can file after someone defames you. Defamation occurs when someone makes a false statement of fact to a third party and causes you harm as a result. Defamation is a tort, which means it is a civil wrong, so you can file suit to obtain monetary damages from the person who committed it.

      Can you sue someone for being deceitful? ›

      If you have been defrauded or deceived by an unscrupulous professional or business, you should know your rights under federal and state law. You may be able to bring a civil claim for damages in addition to reporting the matter to the appropriate government agency for investigation.

      What is unethical for a lawyer? ›

      Attorney misconduct may include: conflict of interest, overbilling, refusing to represent a client for political or professional motives, false or misleading statements, knowingly accepting worthless lawsuits, hiding evidence, abandoning a client, failing to disclose all relevant facts, arguing a position while ...

      What is the most common reason for an attorney to be disciplined? ›

      Professional misconduct is the most common reason for attorney discipline. Lawyers can also be disciplined for conduct in their personal lives.

      Why are some lawyers aggressive? ›

      The personality type that makes certain people aggressive often does not align with a more thoughtful and careful personality type. Lawyers who are very aggressive are so confident in their position that they do not study potential opposing arguments and evidence closely to prepare themselves for the opposition.

      How do you impress a judge in court? ›

      6 Tips to Make a Good First Impression in Court
      1. Know the judge.
      2. Be organized with your paperwork.
      3. Dress Appropriately.
      4. Stay calm in front of the jury.
      5. Keep eye contact with the jury.
      6. Don't be late to court.

      What colors are best to wear to court? ›

      The best colors to wear to court are conservative colors (e.g., white, light or dark gray, navy, dark blue, etc.) and avoid bright and loud colors. Make sure the color of your belt matches the color of your dress shoes.

      Can your words be used against you in court? ›

      The following is the standard Miranda warning: "You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning.

      What is the best evidence rule? ›

      The best evidence rule is a legal principle that holds an original copy of a document as superior evidence. The rule specifies that secondary evidence, such as a copy or facsimile, will be not admissible if an original document exists and can be obtained.

      What does hearsay your honor mean? ›

      1. Hearsay. “Objection! Hearsay, your honor.” Hearsay is one of the most common criminal court objections and basically refers to second-hand information. The basic concept is that statements made by an out-of-court third party cannot be used to establish the truth.

      How do you annoy opposing counsel? ›

      Five More Ways to Irritate Opposing Counsel
      1. Being a Technophobe. Yeah, old-timer. ...
      2. Not Returning Calls. This goes without saying: pick up the dang phone and return a call. ...
      3. Abusive Discovery Dump. We asked for credit card statements. ...
      4. Inflexibility. ...
      5. General Hard*** (Catch-All)
      Mar 1, 2013

      Should you be 100 percent honest with your lawyer? ›

      To do our jobs effectively, it's critical that you are honest with us throughout the process. While shame, guilt, and/or insecurity may tempt you to lie to your lawyer, we strongly advise you to resist the urge.

      What are the four responsibilities of lawyers? ›

      • Advise and represent clients in courts, before government agencies, and in private legal matters.
      • Communicate with their clients, colleagues, judges, and others involved in the case.
      • Conduct research and analysis of legal problems.
      • Interpret laws, rulings, and regulations for individuals and businesses.
      Sep 8, 2022

      Is it better to be honest in court? ›

      Whether you are a plaintiff, a defendant, or a witness, the best thing you can do in any legal dispute is be rigorously honest.

      How often should I be hearing from my lawyer? ›

      There is no set formula for how often you will hear from your attorney. However, the key to a successful attorney client relationship is communication. Whenever there is an important occurrence in your case you will be contacted or notified.

      Does a lawyer read a lot? ›

      To some people, this might seem counterintuitive. As lawyers, we read all day. Sometimes hundreds of pages each day.

      How quickly should your attorney respond? ›

      In addition, you should also expect your attorney to call you back or return your emails promptly. If your attorney does not respond within one business day, they should tell you why they could not answer your question (this can include a heavy caseload or your lawyer being in court for a trial).

      Why do lawyers drag things out? ›

      Your lawyer may deliberately delay a settlement in order to procure evidence that can increase the value of the case. That evidence can show the extent of your losses or who was responsible for the accident.

      What does badgering mean in law? ›

      Primary tabs. Badgering the witness is an objection that counsel can make during a cross-examination of a witness where opposing counsel becomes hostile or asks argumentative questions.

      What are the 4 types of objections? ›

      This is unfortunate because nearly all sales objections come down to one of these four things: need, urgency, trust and money.
      • Lack Of Need. A client must need what you're selling. ...
      • Lack Of Urgency. You've built the relationship, money isn't an issue and the client believes you can help. ...
      • Lack of Trust. ...
      • Lack Of Money.
      Dec 22, 2021

      Can a lawyer go against their clients wishes? ›

      When an attorney ignores their client's wishes, this is considered legal malpractice in many cases. For example, when an attorney ignores their client's wishes and decides to settle their client's claim without their permission, this is considered legal malpractice.

      What happens if a lawyer finds out his client is lying? ›

      When a lawyer has actual knowledge that a client has committed perjury or submitted false evidence, the lawyer's first duty is to remonstrate with the client in an effort to convince the client to voluntarily correct the perjured testimony or false evidence.

      Can two lawyers represent the same client? ›

      The two lawyers may be retained simultaneously by the client at the out- set of a matter, or L2 may be brought in after L1 has begun his or her work. The task of arranging for L2's services may be handled by the client or left to L1. As co-counsel, both lawyers have direct responsibilities to the client.

      Can you send a fake cease and desist letter? ›

      You can send a cease and desist letter yourself. These letters are not legal orders. This means they can be sent by anyone. However, never send a threatening letter.

      Can I be a lawyer if I don't like to read? ›

      Yes. One's ability to read and analyze cases, documents, contracts, and other material is key to success in any aspect of law. If you don't like to read, then you may want to look elsewhere for remuneration.

      Is it illegal to send an email pretending to be a lawyer? ›

      No. It is not legal to impersonate a lawyer in email, phone conversations, with Joe on the street, or in court. It would be especially foolhardy to try to do this via email, since the other party will have all the documentation they will need to prove the fraud you are considering.

      What are the rules of confidentiality? ›

      In law, confidentiality is a legal term that refers to the duty of an individual to refrain from sharing confidential information with others without the express consent of the other party.

      What happens if privileged information is voluntarily disclosed to a third party? ›

      The privilege shields from discovery advice given by the attorney to the client as well as communications from the client to the attorney. Voluntary disclosure of privileged communications to a third party results in waiver of the attorney-client privilege unless an exception applies.

      What are the exceptions to the duty of confidentiality? ›

      Most of the mandatory exceptions to confidentiality are well known and understood. They include reporting child, elder and dependent adult abuse, and the so-called "duty to protect." However, there are other, lesserknown exceptions also required by law.

      What is the difference between confidentiality and attorney-client privilege? ›

      Attorney-client privilege is about the communications between the attorney and the client, whereas attorney-client confidentiality is about case information obtained in the course of representing the client. All privileged information is confidential, but not all confidential information is privileged.

      What are the 3 limits of confidentiality? ›

      Potential Limits of Confidentiality
      • Limits Imposed Voluntarily (i.e., Not Legally Required) ...
      • Limits That Can Be Imposed by Law (i.e., Possible “Involuntary” Disclosures) ...
      • Possible Limitations on Confidentiality Created by Use of Technology in the Setting.

      What is considered a violation of confidentiality? ›

      A breach of confidentiality, or violation of confidentiality, is the unauthorized disclosure of confidential information. It may happen in writing, orally, or during an informal meeting between the parties.

      What violates confidentiality? ›

      A breach of confidentiality happens when data or information that was provided in confidence is disclosed to a third party without the owner's consent.

      What type of information Cannot be kept confidential by the attorney-client privilege? ›

      The privilege extends only to communications that the client intends to be confidential. Communications made in non-private settings, or in the presence of third persons unnecessary to accomplish the purpose for which the attorney was consulted, are not confidential and are not protected by the privilege.

      How do you lose attorney-client privilege? ›

      If you share the communication with a third party – for example, by forwarding an email to someone outside of your business – you can lose the protection of attorney-client privilege.

      What does confidential information will not be disclosed? ›

      A non-disclosure agreement (NDA) is a legally binding contract that establishes a confidential relationship. The party or parties signing the agreement agree that sensitive information they may obtain will not be made available to any others. An NDA may also be referred to as a confidentiality agreement.

      When can confidentiality be breached? ›

      Breaking confidentiality (telling someone else about information that has been disclosed to you) can be a grey area. So, it's important to have an agreed policy on how and when to break confidentiality. We suggest your policy enables you to break confidentiality if: There is immediate danger.

      What are the 5 exceptions to the non disclosure requirements? ›

      Exceptions to an NDA
      • a. When the information is public knowledge: ...
      • b. When the recipient receives information from a third party. ...
      • c. When the information is required to be disclosed by any lawful authority. ...
      • d. The information is known to the recipient before signing the NDA (non-disclosure agreement)
      Sep 28, 2022

      What is the fiduciary duty of confidentiality? ›

      Duty of Confidentiality

      A fiduciary must maintain the confidentiality of all information relating to the beneficiary. They must not use any form of it, whether written or spoken, for their personal gain.

      What overrides attorney-client privilege? ›

      Some of the most common exceptions to the privilege include: Death of a Client. The privilege may be breached upon the death of a testator-client if litigation ensues between the decedent's heirs, legatees or other parties claiming under the deceased client. Fiduciary Duty.

      What is the attorney-client privilege a rule of? ›

      The attorney-client privilege is, strictly speaking, a rule of evidence. It prevents lawyers from testifying about, and from being forced to testify about, their clients' statements. Independent of that privilege, lawyers also owe their clients a duty of confidentiality.

      Are emails between attorney and client privileged? ›

      The attorney-client privilege is a type of privileged communication that is recognized by law and protects certain confidential communications between a lawyer and a client from being included in a discovery process.


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